In the last few years, after the landmark ruling from the Supreme Court of the US (SCOTUS), the number of same-sex weddings have substantially increased. The number of same-sex couples choosing to celebrate their marriage with a ceremony and reception has increased from 43% in 2013 to 79% in 2016 according to a recent study by WeddingWire and GayWeddings.com.
When it comes to types of weddings, LGBT couples are looking for everything from simple city hall events to larger receptions in faraway places. The study shows that same-sex couples spend more per person ($117/guest) versus opposite-sex couples ($100/guest).
All newly engaged couples want to have the best wedding possible. That means different things for different couples. Some care about having a blow-out event and inviting everyone they know; others focus on having an intimate celebration with close family and friends. Whichever option you choose, make sure to consider the following when planning your big day.
Don’t get hung up on traditional roles and expectations
Only 4 percent of gay male couples and 36 percent of lesbian couples have one partner in a suit and the other in a dress. A traditional wedding is full of gender roles, like the fact that the groom is forbidden from seeing the bride before the ceremony and then has to lift her veil. These are trappings of a different time. There is no need for those elements in a same-sex wedding (or any modern wedding for that matter); regardless of what your Aunt Ellen tells you. It’s your day and you can do whatever the heck you want! At Vida Buena Farm, we want you to have the day you have always dreamed of. When evaluating venues, make sure they are on your side and willing to work with you to make it your day.
Be realistic about your budget
This is true for any wedding. Knowing that, on average, same-sex couples spend more per person for their weddings, make sure you budget accordingly. It is a common misperception, and age-old stereotype, that rich gay men having over-the-top weddings. I have news for you – everyone likes a great party. That’s what a wedding reception is. Consider what’s important to you both and budget appropriately: cocktails, hors d’oeuvres, full meal with wine, cake, etc. It all adds up. Check out our recent infographic on average wedding costs.
The Devil is in the details
The logistics of planning a gay or lesbian wedding are a little bit different from an opposite-sex wedding. Who sits where? How do the brides or grooms walk down the aisle separately or together? Does someone give someone away? Who’s in the wedding party? Use our handy vida-buena-farm-wedding-planning-checklist to manage all the details.